27th May 2019
Patience is a virtue, have it if you can. That old saying stands true when discussing sex after childbirth. Resuming you and your partner’s sex life will take some time. Whilst the internet says you can return to “freaky-deaky” after four to six weeks, the reality is that most women need more time. Do well to remember what comes next and you’ll be fine: You. Did. Not. Push. A. Baby. Out. Of. Your. Vagina. So, now that’s cleared up we shall provide 5 ways to navigate sex after childbirth.
Concentrate on your baby
Congratulations, you have a baby! Take the time to know your child and create a manful relationship with them. Chances are, it’s a busy time and there are lots to do with the arrival of your little one. Whilst allowing your partner to rest up, be sure to alleviate the majority of the tasks from your partner. Let fatherhood run riot. Change nappies, wake up at ungodly hours and own morning feeds. These are all ways in which you can contribute to the development of your child.
Understand libido may be low
It’s both common and understandable that will be low weeks or even months after delivering a baby. Your partner is likely to still be sore down below. We advise that you and your partner wait until the six-week check and get given the go-ahead by a doctor. Use this time to connect in other ways, read to each other, cook together, play together. Your partner will appreciate that you are sparking other parts of them their brain.
Reassure, Reassure, Reassure
Your partner may feel body conscious, you must remind her that your baby is here because of her blood sweat and tears and more blood. This is a beautiful thing and her strength and perseverance must be celebrated. It takes around two months for your partner’s uterus to return to normal size so communicate that things will be normal again and that you’re eternally grateful. Reassure your partner that they are more beautiful than ever and the love you have for them is that at an all-time high. These small words of affirmation will work wonders. Be sure to be authentic obviously.
Understand the facts
To name a few, excessive sweating may occur, the breast may be sore and heavy, breast milk tastes sweet, post-pregnancy may cause vaginal dryness so be sure to have water-based lubricant close to hand, intercourse may be painful, vaginal discharge presents itself in the form of blood and what is left of the uterus linen and… good old fashion back pain. Empathy dad, empathy.
Relationships are and forever will be your biggest asset. Navigate each day with your mind and your communication skills. Create an environment that breeds communication and both and your partner will thrive and raise your child in a safe space. In short, speak to your partner and support their needs.
Speaking to your partner about sex can be a sensitive topic for some couples, especially after childbirth however with patience, reassurance and communication easing back into sex with your partner will be a lot easier, just give it time bro.